This weekend revealed a new truth about parenting for me. I realized that I have poorly trained my daughter like Pavlov trained his dog to beg for attention without earning it.
When I was a kid you had to really perfect a performance before you yelled out, "watch me!"
We all knew that there was one shot at a good performance and if you didn't really practice and make it worth your parents time there was a chance you may not get another shot for a long time.
I am not sure if it is the whole modern movement of fragile egos or our obsessive fear of raising kids with poor self-esteem, but I do know this....as Dr. Phil would say, "it's not workin' for us!"
When these kids get older the world and the amazing standards out there are going to chew up these mediocre performances and throw them to the curb, to leave these kids wondering what happened.
This realization has caused me to do a one eighty on what I am praising. I know my child, like you, and know the potential she possesses and because of that, I cannot let her sell her self short for unearned affirmation.
We all want to hear we are great, but the truly great ones become great. They don't throw out a rehearsal and get the same praise for their olympic performance.
If I truly want what is best for my daughter, I will engage in challenging her to practice, study, earn...all that she is and can be and not allow her to lick in the bowl of her own crumbs.
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